After watching 'Julie & Julia' on dvd a few weeks ago I was reminded of my own blog, all forlorn and forgotten. I realised a lot had changed since I last posted, and so will give a brief summary:
In mid-October: I was made redundant just before completing a full year.
As shocked as I was I had also expected this to occur in the near future, but didn't think it would for another few months. At the same I was glad and at peace about finishing up working there as I had started to resent accepting the role despite the gut feeling I had during the interview for the role, the gut feeling telling me that this was not the right place for me. Despite all, I learned a lot of life skills being there and so was excited for whatever was coming ahead in life.
About one week later: I discovered I was pregnant.
I was a month overdue and had been having horrible cramps constantly for a week straight. I was worried that this was due to a cyst that had previously been found in my left ovary, and I was scheduled to have key-hole surgery in January to remove and test it for cancer. So the morning after a week of cramps and worry I went to the doctor to have a blood test done. That afternoon hubby and I went to get the results to find out if it gave an indication of what might be causing the pain. What I'll never forget is the feeling of being told we were going to have a baby. It was complete and pure joy, the same feeling I had felt on our wedding day upon being told Adam and I were husband and wife. We had previously been told that it was highly unlikely that I would fall pregnant as the cyst present in one of the ovaries would prevent it from producing eggs. So this is our miracle baby.
Since then: I am growing and maturing.
I am enjoying the crazy journey of pregnancy with the support for family and friends, and am excited to meet our little bub. I am learning how to be a better wife-lover-friend to my husband and be less selfish, and desire that my heart will expand to embrace those around me so that I may love others better. I am praying that I will be a loving, nurturing mother. I am learning to take better care of our bedroom home and am looking forward to moving out in May, to make that house a home that is welcoming to all who step in, and to finally play with all the wedding gifts we've got as they have all been stored away till we move. Most of all, I am trusting that Jesus' love will always be at the core of all that I do, that I the way I live my life and love myself and others will be in a direct response to His love for us.
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